Warning(s): implied m/m slash, language, fluff, texting-abuse
Word Count: 2,800 - more of a ficlet
Beta: the stunning queencheeze
A/N: Written for hush_pup who chose Jared/Colin and ... not gonna tell you the prompt word cuz it’ll ruin the story. XD Also for all the Jared/Colin girls on my flist. Hope you like.
-beautiful banner by queencheeze -
Jared was stumped, which in reality didn’t happen very often; at least, he didn’t like to admit it did. Colin was out of town filming a movie, but would be back in time for Valentine’s Day. Jared hated Valentine’s Day; well, he used to hate it anyhow, before Colin had surprised the shit out of him the year before. The Alexander-themed weekend had been so special. Jared wasn’t really into trinkets or flowers, and definitely not candy, so a get-away alone with Colin in a setting that held so many great memories for both of them, had been just perfect.
Unfortunately, as much as he wanted to sweep Colin away to some secluded location for the weekend, Jared wanted to be original and think of something for himself, so he’d spent the whole week on pins and needles, wracking his brain for something, anything, unforgettable and Jared-Leto-ish.
Also unfortunate, but at the same time fortunate, was that baby James would be visiting on the weekend, as well. Jared loved James like he was his own, loved him to fucking death, but it would be hard to plan something romantic or kinky with him in the house. Colin was only home for a week, at which point Jared was leaving for Europe, and he definitely didn’t want Colin to miss a second with his son, but at the same time, he selfishly wanted some alone time with him.
He could cook Colin his favorite meal, but that would involve lots of rare, red meat which would definitely not put Jared in a Valentine’s kind of mood, plus cooking was not really something he wanted to spend time doing when Colin and James were in the house. Buying Colin clothes was not an option, either, since despite how he appeared in public, Colin was really fussy about what he wore, not to mention how boring it would be to give clothes for Valentine’s. Colin had offered an idea via text from London, but Jared was more than a little un-amused with his suggestion, especially with James in the house.
-- Is the washing machine broken?
-- The washing machine, love, is it broken?
-- Could you break it then?
-- What are you talking about?
-- I’m asking you to break the washer. Are you having trouble with your eyes, old man?
-- Are you drunk?
-- That was uncalled for.
-- You called me old man.
-- Fine, point taken. Did you play tag as a child?
-- What is with your randomness today? Are you bored?
-- Have I ever taught you my way of playing tag?
-- I’m not sure I want to know.
-- It involves chasing you around the house naked. Would be a perfect Valentine’s Day gift, don’t you think?
-- Goodbye, Colin.
-- Your heart and your ass.
-- That’s all I want.
-- How romantic.
-- Or you could put on a pretty wedding dress and make me an honest man.
-- Goodbye, Colin
-- Love you, old man.
-- Back at you.
-- Is that all I get a week before Valentine’s Day?
-- Fine. I love you. Goodbye.
-- See you soon.
Colin was an idiot, but Jared loved him anyway; however, neither fact helped him in his quest for the perfect Valentine’s Day gift.
“How about a stuffed leprechaun?”
“What the fuck kind of suggestion is that?” Jared hissed at his brother as Tomo snickered nearby. “Are you gonna help or not?”
“How about matching scarves and toques?” Shannon continued.
“Oh, and matching mittens!” Tomo snickered.
Shannon smirked and gave Jared a gentle shove. “We’re just messing with you, dude. Wow, you’re so pissy today.”
Jared shook his head and shoved Shannon back. “You guys do this sappy shit, too?”
“Of course. It’s the most romantic day of the year.” Shannon fluttered his eyelashes at Jared, his mouth opening wide when Jared shoved him off his chair. “See ... pissy!”
“Why don’t you just ask him what he wants?” Tomo said.
“What kind of stupid gift would that be?” Jared thought they were both just fucking nuts, and he really had no idea why he’d even bothered asking them for help.
“Yeah, bad idea, Tome,” Shannon agreed. “Besides, Colin would just say he wanted to play naked tag.”
“You fucker!” Jared squawked. “You were looking in my Blackberry, again.”
Shannon snickered and moved out of the way before his brother could smack him. “It was kinda sweet, actually ... old man.”
“I’m so gonna kick your ass.”
“That’s all Colin wants anyhow ... your ass.”
Tomo jumped between the Letos, used to being the buffer between them when they started poking at each other. “Back in your corners, men,” he snickered, placing a hand on each of their chests. “Shan, I’m only gonna protect you for so long. Why you riling him up?”
“‘Cuz he should be thinking about the tour, not about some silly gift for Colin.”
“Silly gift?” Tomo said, turning his whole body to the older Leto.
“You know what I meant.” Shannon held out his hands in surrender, stepping back from Tomo as he was suddenly backed into a corner of the kitchen. Jared stood and watched, smirking as his tough-as-nails brother shrank away from his lover.
“You did get me something, right?” Tomo said, stepping even closer to Shannon, his head leaning in so their faces were only inches apart. “Right?”
“I ... I ...”
Jared snickered, showing himself to the door as Tomo continued to glare at Shannon. “Good luck, bro.”
“Tomo ... baby ...”
“Don’t “baby” me.”
“Ever hear of naked tag?”
Colin had Jared feeling like he was mentally unstable for the next couple days. Texting. Texting. Texting. And not just texts, stupid texts that made Jared want to pull his hair out, and, of course, absolutely none of Colin’s ideas were even of any use.
-- Naked tag still on the agenda?
-- Don’t you have work to do?
-- They give me lots of breaks since I’m so perfect.
-- More like a lot of time-outs cuz you’re so disruptive. And no, to the naked anything.
-- Not if you don’t stop sending me stupid texts.
-- There’s a woman on set in a wedding dress, and I can’t help thinking you’d look much better in the gown than she does. Ever thought about wearing one?
-- I’m turning my phone off now.
-- Just giving you ideas, love.
-- Bad ideas.
-- I could think of some better ones.
-- I’ll figure it out for myself, thanks.
Baby-proofing the house was always time-consuming, but necessary, and for some reason Jared and Colin always un-baby-proofed it after James left. Maybe they’d figure it out eventually, but that was Jared’s job at the moment. He’d found himself aching a little when he had to bend over, and had definitely done a whole lot of swearing at Colin’s fucking messiness and carelessness, but he’d got it done. The house was ready for James ... and Colin.
-- Wanna know what I’m getting you?
-- No, Colin! Sort of takes the fun out of it, doesn’t it?
-- So you don’t want the wedding ring I bought you?
-- Nope. I don’t wear rings.
-- What about a joint gift?
-- You wanna buy me pot?
-- No. A gift for the two of us.
-- How does that even work?
-- We agree not to get anything for each other and then get something together later.
-- Who is this?
-- You don’t sound like the Colin I know and love.
-- Is that a compliment or that stupid Leto humor that I don’t usually get?
-- Bye Colin.
-- Flight’s delayed.
-- How long?
-- More like cancelled until tomorrow.
-- So you’ll be in when?
-- Not til Saturday night. Sorry.
-- Not your fault.
-- James there?
-- Yep, he’s eating something really disgusting and messy.
-- Take a pic and send it. One with him and his “luff”.
-- LOL. Okay.
-- And give him a hug for me at bedtime.
-- Of course.
-- Love you. Will call you tomorrow.
-- And ...
-- Love you, too.
Jared barely remembered Colin coming home the night before. It was late and he’d fallen asleep in their bed with James in his arms, the warm, little body snuggled close. He remembered Colin whispering something about “his favorite boys,” then taking James from the bed and crawling in himself shortly after. The last thing he remembered was Colin’s arm coming around him, wrapping him in his sweet, familiar fragrance and heat.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, Cols.” Jared stuck his tongue in Colin’s ear, moving his body so it molded against Colin, one arm slung over his hip, cock pressed cozily in the crack of Colin’s ass.
“Give that monster out of me ass, Leto,” Colin growled, shoving Jared off and turning onto his back. “That’s definitely not what I’m giving ya for Valentine’s.”
Jared snickered, kissed Colin on the cheek, then bounced from the bed. “Bloody fucking morning person,” Colin growled, again. “Where ya off to so early?”
“Nowhere. I’m getting your gift.”
“But ...” Colin stammered. “I thought we’d agreed to get something together.”
“You agreed. I didn’t.” Jared moved back to the bed, crawling on his knees until he got to Colin. Colin rose up on his elbows as Jared leaned in to kiss him. “But you can give me your ass, instead.”
“Feisty this morning, ain’t ya?”
“Here, open your gift.” Jared tossed a big envelope on Colin’s lap, watching as Colin’s eyes lit up. The fucker did love to get presents, made him shine like a little kid. He sat up straighter and reached for Jared, but was immediately pushed away. “Open it now, before James wakes up.”
Colin nodded and tore off the flap of the envelope. “Nice wrapping, Jared. Shannon teach you that?”
“I’m gonna tell him you said that.”
“Ppfftt. I’m not afraid of Shannon.” Jared lifted an eyebrow. “Fine, just a little.”
“Shut up and open it.”
Colin smirked, pulling the papers from the envelope, an even bigger smile taking over his face. “St. Bart’s? We’re going to fucking St. Bart’s? Holy fucking Christ!” He grabbed Jared in a bear hug, snickering and drooling. “I’ve never been there. Good choice, love.”
Jared pulled away. “You’re not done, keep going!”
“What’s this? An itinerary or ...” Colin’s eyes suddenly clouded over, his brows knitted comically on his forehead. His mouth dropped open and remained there, while Jared’s face stayed completely serious.
“What? You don’t like my surprise?” Jared’s face was somber as he pulled away from Colin. “You weren’t serious about this?”
“I ... I ... er ... I ...”
“I spent a lot of time having these papers drawn up, not to mention a lot of money on the tickets. You’re the one who’s been hinting about it relentlessly. What are you trying to say? Don’t you love me enough, Colin?”
“I don’t ... I didn’t ... bloody fucking ‘ell ... of course, I love ya ...”
“Great!” Jared’s 100 kilowatt smile lit up the room. “And there’s more. Just stay there, okay?”
Colin nodded as Jared left the room, turning to his side, the tickets and papers taunting him from Jared’s side of the bed. Jared smirked to himself as he readied the final part of his surprise, quickly slipping out of his boxers and into the rest of Colin’s gift.
“Hey Cols?” he said, walking back into the room. “Can you help me with this zipper?”
Colin looked up from the papers in his hands, his face suddenly turning ash white, mouth dropping open, again. “Jared? What the fuck are you ... you didn’t think I was ... holy fucking Christ!”
Jared turned his back, motioning at Colin to come closer and zip up the back of the flowing white gown he’d slipped into. His hands moved over the satiny material, smoothing it gently against his hips as Colin continued to gape. “It’s not too much is it? I didn’t want to overdo it so I didn’t bother with a train, but this lace in the front and the sweetheart neckline are to die for, don’t you think? We’ll have to get you a new tux, too, babe. I was thinking kind of retro powder blue or something like that. Not too formal, can’t have you outshining the bride after all. Colin? Are you gonna do me up or what?”
Jared turned around, struggling to keep a frown on his face as he looked at Colin’s shocked mug. “You okay? I thought you said you wanted to get married for Valentine’s Day?”
“I ... um ... I ....”
“We can do it somewhere else if you don’t like St. Bart’s, but it’s a pretty sweet place for weddings on the beach, and Marc Jacob’s got married there last year. Colin?”
“You’re fucking scaring me.”
“Fucker,” Jared hissed.
“I’m not saying I don’t wanna marry ya. I don’t know what to say, really. Is this ...”
“You’re so fucking gullible.”
“We’re not getting married, Colin.”
“Fuck no. I don’t believe in it for heteros, let alone homos.”
“Then what the fuck ...”
“Payback’s a bitch, love.”
“You bugged the fuck out of me all week so I had to do something to take the piss out of you.”
“But the dress ... the papers ... the tickets ...”
“All fake, well, except for the dress. I borrowed it, but it does look pretty hot on me, don’t you think?”
“I’m joking. You seriously think I like wearing dresses?” Jared shook his head in disgust, narrowing his eyes at Colin. “Are you gonna pass out or something?”
“I’m not so sure I like your joke.”
“Payback’s a ...”
“Bitch. I know, ya already said that. I can’t believe you did that to me ... on Valentine’s, no less.”
Jared stuck his bottom lip out comically, forcing a smile from Colin’s grumpy face. “Wanna see your real present?”
Colin squinted his eyes in suspicion. “I dunno. I’m having a few trust issues at the moment.”
Jared turned around again, stripping the dress from his shoulders and letting it fall to the floor.
“Christ, love! Do you know you have a fucking heart on your ass?”
“Look closer,” Jared teased, wiggling his naked bottom provocatively. He sighed when he felt Colin’s fingers grasp his hip, then hot breath caress his ass. He was a little nervous when Colin didn’t say anything at first, since he’d already put Colin through the wringer, until he finally felt something completely different. “Did you just lick my tattoo?”
“It’s fucking gorgeous,” Colin purred.
“You did say you wanted my heart and my ass.”
“You are fucking briliant! And is that little “C” for me?”
“No, it’s for my mom,” he sneered. “Oh fuck ... I never thought of that.”
Colin snickered, wrapping his arms around Jared from behind. “I think we need to break it in, don’t you?”
“James should be awake soon.”
“I’ll be quick.”
“You always are.”
Colin groaned. “Oh, you’re fucking kill me, love.”
“Gonna let me fuck you for my present?”
“I ... um ... I thought we were gonna discuss that some more ... at a later date.”
Jared shrugged, pushing his bare ass back into Colin’s hips. “That’s okay. I already arranged something else.”
“No, from you.”
Jared turned quickly in Colin’s arms, pushing him back onto the bed and laying flat on top of him. He captured Colin’s lips with his, pressing hard and licking across the crease until Colin opened his mouth. The kiss lasted a while, Colin’s hands moving over Jared’s ass until Jared pulled away with a yip. “Ow, fuck! Still a little tender.”
“Want me to kiss it better?”
“Did ya ever tell me what I’m giving you?”
“Oh yeah. My tattoo guy will be here at noon.”
“Your tattoo guy ...”
“I want your heart and your ass, too ... love.”
Additional note: Prompt word was tattoo. :P And to hush_pup , you wanted NC-17 and since it never went that way, I owe you another prompt. :)